Exclamation Points and Pedicures

I’m a child. There. I admit it.

“I don’t wanna” might be my most favorite excuse in the world. Moreover, (and what child do you know uses “moreover”?), I can find a million excuses to not do anything I don’t wanna. Facebook, YouTube, guitar playing, reading, TV, and sitting in silence are some of my favorite means of prolonging the doing of the task I don’t wanna do.

So, three weeks ago, I hurt my ankle. I don’t know how. I went to bed on Monday night, and on Tuesday my ankle was the size of a golf ball.

Now, to be fair, this is a bad ankle I had sprained in the worst possible way a few years ago, so I roll it and twist it often.

For three weeks, I have not run. (I’m a fake runner.) For three weeks, I have spent the vast majority of my time in flip-flops. (This is not news, but I haven’t had the option to change into anything else.) For three weeks, I have tried not to limp. And for three weeks, I have had multiple friends tell me to get an x-ray.

But I don’t wanna.

——————

“It’s liver and onions. Eat it.”

 It smelled funny – funny strange.

What is it?”

I mean, I heard him say “liver and onions,” but what was with the texture. And the smell. The whole thing was odd.

“Your dinner.”

Oh, my dad. So simple. So direct. That was his clear way of saying, “You’re eating liver and onions for dinner. That’s it. Don’t try to get out of it.”

“Well, I’m not eating that.”

There was a flare of nostrils. This was getting serious.

“Well, that’s all you’re getting.”

He ate his food.

The stand-off lasted through breakfast two days later. I won. Cereal replaced the leftovers of liver and onions.

“I don’t wanna” – 1; liver and onions – 0.

————————————–

This is not my foot.

So, for three weeks, amid claims of “It’s a hairline fracture” and “It should be healed already” and “You’re still limping?” and “Go get an x-ray,” I have stood firm in my I don’t wanna-ness.

Then, my Achilles heel…bribery and sweetness.

“Do you want to go to that clinic today after we meet? I know you don’t WANT to, but let’s go anyway!!”

During dinner last night, I had informed my sweet friend that my ankle was still bothering me, and I should just suck it up and go to the med clinic for an x-ray. “It’s the adult thing to do.”

I respond to her morning text: “Nah…no me gusta.” I’m a bilingual child.

“I know que no te gusta, but you need to be better. Let’s go!”

“You won’t make this fun with exclamation points,” I quip. Can one “quip” in a text message?

“What do you mean??!!!”

Clever. That got a smile.

“Come on!!!! It will take less than an hour! Pleaseeeeeee!”

Dammit. Why does she care that much if I go for a damn x-ray? I don’t wanna. Hmm…how.to.respond.

“Can we get pedicures after?”

I am aware that I have a hurt ankle, and I will have to be clear with my pedicure lady that she will have to be gentle, but c’mon…it’s a pedicure!

“Yes!!!”

Dammit. “Then, yes.”

So, today I’m heading to the med clinic for an x-ray. Hairline fracture or not, I’m clear that I shouldn’t have waited this long. And while it took bribery to get me there, I’m still going. That’s rather adult of me.

Now, I’m gonna eat my gummy vitamins and have some Peanut Butter Crunch for breakfast. No. Really.

I’ll let you know if it’s broken.

UPDATE: It’s not broken. It’s a sprain. I am, however, in a boot. I know…it’s hot.

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4 thoughts on “Exclamation Points and Pedicures

  1. Your friend is smart, good for you for getting it done even though you “didn’t wanna”. My favorite expressions are “eyes on your own paper” and “none of your bees wax”, i use those when I don’t want to answer questions.

  2. I broke my foot, base of my 5th metatarsal to be exact, right before we moved. There’s not really a whole lot that can be done for it aside from putting you in a walking boot to immobilize your foot and telling you to stay off of it. Army docs wanted to do surgery (I have a chunk of bone that’s sorta just floating out there in my foot that’ll never attach to anything) but the civilian doc that I saw doesn’t want to. Meh, all I know is, it’s August, I broke it in April & my foot still hurts. Hope yours heels quicker than mine!

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